After last week’s existential crisis I had while trying to get up the courage to commit to doing some ceremonial magick, the first week of our Star Ruby challenge has been a bit of a doddle. It’s all gravy baby. Here’s a quick roundup, I’ve invoked two angels, my Holy Guardian Angel and I was contacted by the dead father of a friend of mine, which did freak me out, as you’ll hear at first, but I’ve come to realise it’s something I should be very happy with.
Anyway, because I know you are all such devoted listeners to the TaSTA podcast you’ll know that we started the most recent podcast with me making fun of the ceremonial aspects of the ritual and why they haven’t been sitting well with me. Even though things have gone quite well and well, far better than I ever could have expected to be honest, the names and phrases just don’t…well, they don’t speak to me, they don’t do it for me. I have trouble identifying with Eros, with Babylon, with Psyche and the other one, these names don’t mean much to me but I’ve said them and done them and it can only lead me to the conclusion that it’s not the names that you say or the step aerobics that you have to do that gets the woo juices going, it seems to be that it’s really the intent that works.
Why bother with any of it then? Well, that’s a good question and this week I’ll start experimenting with some god names I do identify with, Dagda, Anu, Ogma and Cernunnos for example, kickass Celtic gods that mean the world to me…fast forward three weeks later and Spud is prancing around his living room in wolfskin robes, wearing antlers from a deer he’s caught with his bear hands and boots made from sheepskin he used the wolf to help catch until he turned on the wolf and is invoking Persephone, Minerva, Kukulkan and Manitou…in fairness that does sound pretty cool.
Back to Week I though, so I’ve made a few recordings instead of keeping a diary. Trust me on this, I’ve tried very hard to keep a magical diary on a few occasions and it always bores me to tears so it’s probably better to record the results.
I’ve recorded four of the six days
Day 1: Raphael the Archangel
Deciding to do the English version instead of the Greek. Using the older guardians of Eros, Babylon etc as well. Also deciding to do invoking following the ritual on the advice of a few people who have said something along the lines of there’s no point in banishing and then not invoking so, OK, I thought let’s give it a try.
I’ve had some health questions/issues of late so I went to the main man when it comes to health issues and invoked the Archangel Raphael, as I was talking to him in my meditation I felt a presence coming at me and a whoosh and I was quiet because I felt like he’d heard me and that I didn’t need to be rattling on at him. It was lovely.
I did a card reading, receiving The Dead of The 40 Servants.
The Dead: This Servant shows us our connection to our Ancestors, and humanity’s past. She encourages us to learn from the past, so that we don’t make the same mistakes over and over.
Of course, I’m willing to take the hint there from Raphael and learn from the past and to stop making the same mistakes. I hope I’ve understood him correctly.
A Second card fell when I was putting them back and it was The Gatekeeper:
This Servant shows us how to get into areas of our life that we feel locked out of. He encourages us to know that there is always a key to every door.
I’ve taken this to be in connection with this new adventure in..err…Woo Woo with Tommie. We’re both blogging on the site now and I’ve a very good feeling that things are going to get weird over the next few months and years and I’m all for that.
Day 2: It’s Personal, OK?
A little bit easier today with the wording. Although, being honest these words just aren’t fitting with me, I need to change something. I’m just not feeling a connection to the gods/guardians.
I again invoked an angel and did a divination with the Thoth Tarot card, receiving the ‘Adjustment’ Card. There was quite a lot to dig out on this. I asked a few questions of the angel and I don’t really want to give too much away here as it was deeply personal but suffice to say that I was given a message that I’ll get help as and when it’s needed or even if it’s actually needed and until then to continue along the road, remain objective and rational on the way.
Day 3: Sabbath Rest
No recording. No Star Ruby. Sunday. Didn’t feel like it.
Day 4: I See Dead People?
Following the podcast with Tommie I did my next Star Ruby and now armed with an even better translation of the end part of the ritual which goes like this:
Before me the Spells (lunges)
Behind me the Mysteries
On my right the Constraints
On my left the Spirits
About me blazes the Pentagram
And in the Stone, the Star of Six is fixed.
Much more identifiable then what I was saying, even though it was working. Look, I know some people will say you have to stay true to the formula but for me it’s like driving a car, I can’t drive a car the way you do, I need to adjust the seat, I’m short, I need to adjust the mirrors, I’m short, I need to erase all your radio stations coz your taste in music is horrific, etc.
Following the ritual I did one of my favourite meditations, the Beloved Meditation from Alan Chapman’s Magia. Albeit, I don’t follow Chapman’s instructions to the letter, I add something. Anyway, I start with connecting with The Divine Self, saying ‘My Divine Self, I offer you my momentary fate and place my eternal destiny in your hands.’ which changes to: ‘Heart of my Heart, I offer you my momentary fate and place my eternal destiny in your hands.’ as the meditation deepens. This isn’t the proper way, it’s my way of doing it. Since coming across this teaching I’ve always associated it with the HGA. The HGA is, for me, the non-dual becoming dual to show us that the universe is a non-duality. It’s a higher form of consciousness that we should strive to become. I’m sure a HGA article, or many of them will appear on these pages over the next while so we’ll come back to that, fear not.
Anyway, I did this meditation thinking I would connect with Minerva and do a tarot divination afterwards with some advice or message from her. That did not happen. What happened scared the bejesus out of me. A hole appeared in the sky above me and I saw the face of a man I recognised as the father of a friend of mine. He died not too long ago. He looked younger than when he’d died, about 20 or 30 years younger. Anyway, as you’ll hear in the recording he told me to get in touch with his son again and rekindle the friendship as his son missed me as a friend.
I obviously became quite emotional and a bit scared so to calm down I repeated the mantra of the meditation and then spoke to my friend’s Dad. It’s probably best to listen to the recording to be honest.
To finish up I said a direct translation of the Aramaic version of the Our Father in English which is far more mystical than what we would have said going to church on Sunday. Here’s a link: https://medium.com/change-your-mind/the-mystical-poetry-of-the-lords-prayer-in-its-original-aramaic-34b6a37ec56.
Day 5: Minerva
Day five, it’s getting easier and faster, I’ve all the names down now and I’ve found a translation that works best for me, just kind of fits better. I had planned on evoking the HGA (Minerva) all day and then doing the Remote View for Nuggan that’ll be in one of the videos soon. Before I began though I changed my mind and decided to do a Fire Practice/Meditation, I’m not sure why I changed my mind but I did.
As usual I take the Fire meditation and I bastardise it. At it’s simpliest though, you notice things, you name them, then you associate them with of prongs a fire and when you see that they are both the same they dissolve, or in this case burn, into nothing. It’s a fascinating process to see that everything is in actuality an illusion, but I’m sure we’ll come back to that some day. There’s a mantra too, but I’m not much for those
It wasn’t long before I felt Minerva wanted to grab my attention so I got out my 40 Servants Deck and did a divination. Here’s what I got…
To improve my relationship with XYZ:
The Dead: stop repeating same pattern, need to break the cycle
Anything she’d like to tell me:
The Giver: Telling me to be generous and be grateful for what I have, or maybe she’s happy to have me and to give me
guidance? Prob the first one. Stay grounded and happy with what you have and be sharing/good to people around me
Any opinions on Chapman’s Magia?
The Mother, The Witch
Mother: Birth of new things, new period in life? All is well? Be safe and relaxed about the teachings
Witch: See the mystery and magic of life, Ha, nice one 🙂 Something special is happening.
We can take that she likes Magia 😉
Regarding yesterday’s vision of X is this something I should pursue and learn more about?
The Conductor, the Protector
Cond: Take the reigns of your life and be in control with the aim of harmony
Prot: Be aware, stay out of harm’s way, be cautious about this, know what you’re getting into.
Should I contact specific dead people, or allow them to come to me
The Lovers, The Chaste
Lovers: Deeper levels of love…so people I’ve known
Chaste: Do it with a good heart, not for shits and giggles, take this seriously.
I said thank you Minerva, and when I turned the cards over The Father was there to say hello, or goodbye as the case may be.
Father: Guidance, wisdom for the future to take on challenges.
I thanked her again and said I’m very happy to have her guiding and helping me in my life
2nd time the Father. Ha!
As above…so below 😛
I asked Tommie for some help with these two and he added:
The Lovers /Chaste thing, to me could point to deep bonds or relationships that weren’t sexual, but felt like actual loving relationships.
And the Dead could also suggest that you look to see how other family members deal with XYZ or how other families members (including ancestors) dealt with each other. Did any of them get on really well? What did they do that made that possible?
So, some very interesting things there. Following that I did a short Metis/Incubation/Peter Kingley meditation where I felt I could remote view some family and friends and when I realised I could see them I tried to interact with them and so I gave them all a hug and then I felt myself growing massively huge and I gave the whole world a big hug. Good times.
If I think about thinking then I’m thinking about thinking about thinking, which is the same thing but done in two different ways. Neither of which are real because everything is imagined anyway. That won’t exactly blow your mind but it’s just a wee trick the mind does to itself.
This feels like a beginning, the Star Ruby challenge has given me quite a long to ponder upon over the last few day. Today I did the ritual and sat with my thoughts reflecting on the last few days, particularly on yesterday’s meditation. It’s been an eventful week, I’m looking forward to next week already, on a building site with my Father in Law maybe I’ll teach him some Greek. Apo Pantos Kakodaimonos mis amigos!
Star Ruby Ritual breakdown PDF
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LINKS & STUFF:
– I make wood art, custom sigils, Celtic art and more,
and write short fiction stories over on spudmurphy.net.
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– Spud’s Instagram
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